Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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