But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Semen is not good for contacts.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
