I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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