Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.

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(917): View more from New York City

I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.

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(410): View more from Maryland

i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there

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(408): View more from California

You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.

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(206): View more from Washington

second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.

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(540): View more from Virginia

I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.

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