So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
