I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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