Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
