woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
