Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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