My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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