That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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