Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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