You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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