this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
