You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
