They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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