she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
