capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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