3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Someone signed my nipple.
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