Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Actions speak louder than pants.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
