Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I want her autograph on my taint
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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