I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
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