Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
