some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
