brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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