Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Do vagina's smell?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize