My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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