if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
