no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I wish i was in the wii world.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
