I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Randomize
