You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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