I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
