we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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