THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
