i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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