I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize