just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
