Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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