Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
