ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize