She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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