gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
