Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
