her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
