Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Randomize
