As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
