did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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