My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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