Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Sorry my hands just texted you
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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