Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
