So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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